Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Gearing it up one level

I took my first spin class this morning. Despite my expectations, I did not die. I thought about it, but, quite frankly, I didn't have the energy to do it.

Spinning is very similar to having a baby. You can't feel your legs. You keep pushing because someone tells you. There is a lot of counting involved. You have to be remided to breathe. Being hooked up to fluids would've been helpful as I've had a dehydration headache all afternoon. And you just keep praying nothing rips "down there." And the soreness in your hoo-ha lasts.

And lasts. And I even borrowed one of the gym's gel seats. There were people in the class without gel seats and I'm quite certain they have crotches of steel.

About 5 minutes into the class, I wanted to die. And all we'd done was warm up. I was certain that I wouldn't make it another 45 minutes. Beth, the instructor, tells us that there are five ways to climb this hill and we're going to do all 5. I'm confused, because I see no hill. And also we have to keep tabs on our cadence so we're going to count for 15 seconds. She tells us to be somewhere between 20 and 27 for fifteen seconds. But that we'll thank her later if we are between 20 and 24. I shocked myself by being 24 at my first cadence check. But then we "geared up one level" (aka cranked up the resistance knob) and after 2 minutes--more counting. Down to 22. Apparently, I was supposed to "commit" to that number and stick with the pace, despite the fact that I was going to "gear up" 4 more times. By that 5th hill, I was pleased to still be peddling at all and registered an 18. Oh well. My hoo-ha hurt to much to peddle any faster. And I was busy concentrating on breathing, the sweat pouring off my body, and trying to peddle with my feet parallel with the floor. I did not do a good job with the parallel thing because my toes kept going numb. And oh yeah, after class did we mind signing a release form because the gym's photographer showed up to take pictures for next season's brochure. Awesome. I'll be the sweaty one trying not to die in the back.

And sometimes I got confused about the handlebars. When you are 'running with resistance' or 'jumping' or 'really getting at that hill' you are standing up. This is great because it gives your hoo-ha a break. But apparently, you are not supposed to be using the handlebars as a fulcrum to take weight off your jello jiggly legs. Beth reminds us our hands our for balance and asks us to raise them up to check to make sure we weren't cheating. Mmmm, yeah, not so much. I could do the jumping without shifting my weight, but that was about it. (Jumping is just standing up, peddling a few times and then sitting back down. And oh yeah--sitting down is getting "back in the saddle.") And don't even get me started with the darn toe clip thingys that popped off half-way up a hill. I had to readjust them and I almost fell off the darn bike.

But all in all--I'm pretty proud of myself. I'm going to start "spinning" every Wednesday during the morning class. I may even get my own gel seat. Or some of those fancy shoes some of the others were wearing. (I just love it when sports have their own cute shoes!)

5 comments:

Joy | Love | Chaos said...

Were I drinking milk, I would have snarfed it across the room.

All the way across the room.

Freaking hysterical, sweets. Now I want to feel the pain. I have to get my sorry (wide) ass to my fancy new gym. They totally opened on Sunday. I think it's time to get back to it.

Can't wait to see you guys in November. I'm crazy here but in a good way. Up to my eyes in details and diy, but also really happy. And that's what it's all about.

Can't wait to hear about next wednesday! ; )

Courtney said...

I've been following your blog for a little while (I came across it from Mollie's blog, who I hired a few months back to take some photos of my son and me), and I just have to tell you that I think you're hilarious! You are so witty, smart, and funny, and I just love your writing. You are fantastic...keep up the good work!

mollie said...

two words. padded shorts. they have saved me many a crotch bruise ;)

i'm proud of you for going! i love spin class. too bad you dont have my giant feet or i'd mail you my special shoes for the next 9 or so months. haha

Janell Cowley said...

Way to go lady!!! I am so proud of you and your dedication. Makes me feel the need to burn calories, but as it would be counter productive until after January. Once I'm there you'll have to be my motivational coach so I can run in the 5K too.

the reppard crew said...

EJ . . . I am SO with you after these babies come. I love spinning (and can totally relate to the weird pains and risk of falling off the stationary bike!) Talk to you soon!