Best Reason Ever to wear a silly hat

On Tuesday we received Gracie’s Final Order of Adoption decree. She is legally ours.

I thought it would feel different; that the legality of it all would sink in and in some sense she would feel “more” my daughter. But I’m not quite certain it feels any more “real” than it did when I first held her in my arms at UVA hospital. Perhaps if we’d had to go to court, but I doubt it. How can something that is true become more true?

By definition, it can’t.

We’d been waiting awhile for the order to come in the mail. On Monday I received an email from a Bethany case worker asking about an article I was writing for their newsletter and also congratulating me on the adoption being finalized. Perplexed, I called and simply told them that they must know something I didn’t. I called our lawyer, and sure enough, the adoption was finalized and entered into law on July 19th.

July 19th. Last Monday. Sloan went to Orlando for the week and I took Henry to surf camp. I spent the afternoon on the phone with Dell computers. I changed poopy diapers and had no idea that suddenly, officially, Gracie was now legally named Grace and that she was ours.

Or…to put it in more legal terms…

ADJUDGE, ORDER, and DECREE that henceforth this child shall be, to all intents and purposes, the child of the Petitioners, Charles Sloan Phillips and Elizabeth Johnson Phillips and shall be entitle to all the rights and privileges (there are few), and subject to all the obligations (there are many) of a child of these Petitioners born in lawful wedlock.


And it further appearing to the court that the petition filed in this cause includes a prayer (how nice, it includes a prayer!) that the child’s name be changed to Margaret Grace Phillips the Court does further ADJUDGE, ORDER, and DECREE that henceforth this child’s name shall be Margaret Grace Phillips…

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a thousand times, my feelings are not a barometer for truth. And yet here, I think I may have actually got it right. Yes, it was not entered into law in the Commonwealth of Virginia until July 19th, 2010, but she has been my daughter since the dawn of time. In the beginning, when the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters, God loved me and Sloan and Henry and Grace and He knew we belonged to each other and to Him.

And THAT is worth celebrating!! So we pulled out some pink champagne sent to us by friends for the occasion, and ate a celebratory meal…of cereal. Because me celebrating does not include cooking. That’s right, Robin Leach, here in the Midlo, we folks live on Champagne and Miniwheat dreams—we call it Lifestyles of the Middle-classed and lazy. It works for us.

But we WILL be celebrating big time for Super G’s birthday. Yes, we will be those folks who have a ridiculous bash for their one year old. There probably won’t be pony rides, but I’m wearing Sloan down on the bounce house idea.

SO PUT IT ON YOUR CALENDARS FOLKS. OCTOBER 23, 2010. AND YES, YOU ARE INVITED. COME ONE, COME ALL. We will be putting a robe on our daughter (it’s a costume party, of course!) and killing the fatted calf (okay, BBQ from the Q) and celebrating God’s faithfulness to us, that we are a family, and that our little G is turning one. In lieu of gifts, (ok, if you are related to her, I still expect you to get her a gift!!!), we will be receiving donations to Bethany Christian Services off of their baby registry at Wal-Mart. These items, baby clothes, diapers, formula, etc., go to new adoptive parents and also to interim foster parents caring for infants.

I’m not kidding. You are invited. Even if you live in North Carolina, Pennsylvania, Florida, or Texas or will be 8 months pregnant or both (seriously, I have 8 friends who are due with babies from October to December). Because let’s face it, can you think of a better reason to stick your pants on your head and party?