Seriously?

Henry just received a care package from his Gigi and Papa (my parents). These care packages are usually things I've left at their house that my mother believes us unable to operate with until our next trek to Greensboro. (As if we only have one sippy cup, bib, or pair of pajamas. Or for some reason are unable to go to Rite Aid and pick up more Children's Liquid Zyrtec.)

But sometimes the pickle receives gifts from Gigi and Papa. These care packages are my personal favorites because a)they usually arrive without a note. I simply open a box and find a toy, with absolutely no explanation or way to figure out who sent it save for the return address being a UPS store in Greensboro, NC, and b) often the toys are hysterically advanced or superfluous.

In short, they are items only a grandparent would purchase. As in finger paints for an 8 month old. (Gigi's response, Oh, he will just love it. My thoughts, are you planning on visiting to clean this up?) Or "glitter" crayons. (Mom, we have loads of crayons. Yes, dear, but do you have ones with glitter in them? No, mom. We do not.) Or perhaps you need a pair of pajamas with dogs all over them and the accompanying book that matches the pjs. Apparently the dog is named Fergus. (Actually, no complaints here. Free book. Free clothes. We like reading and not being naked here in the Phillips house.)

Today's care package?

The Super Soaker Max-D 2000. Apparently, this must be the appropriate toy for a 2 year old boy with glitter crayons. It can shoot water for up to 35 feet. Seriously, mom. You're arming my son? Great. Now I've got to go buy Sloan and I guns just to defend ourselves.