Fingers Crossed

Tonight is a pretty big milestone in the Phillips house.  

Tonight, no one is sleeping in a crib.  

That's right.  Gracie is spending her first night in her big girl bed.  

I'd like to tell you how well she is doing--that we are twenty minutes into the night and she has yet to get out of bed.  That she has yet to jump on the bed.  That she is quietly snuggled up with her Pinkie and LaLas and is nodding off to sleep.  And that is all true, but, this not being my first time at the rodeo, I will not brag about this seemingly easy transition because I know that will jinx it.  Becuase the second you holler from the rooftops that your infant is sleeping through the night, that same child becomes a zombie wanting to eat every thirty minutes.  And the minute you toss out the diapers, your child that has gone months without a potty accident will suddenly start peeing their pants every 10 minutes.  So, I'll simply let the pictures speak for themselves and confess, that yes, we finally bit the bullet and bought one of those fancy dancy video monitors because, well, because we are a little afraid of our high spirited two year old.  

Loving the new big bed.

And by big girl bed, I mean a queen size.  Though, it should be counted as a princess size bed.

 Twenty minutes later and she is out.  I had to whisper to her to lay back down and to snuggle her baby a couple of times as she crawled towards the edge of the bed, and I think my voice coming from no where sort of freaked her out.  But she obeyed. 

Your Christmas Present

Over Thanksgiving, my three nephews (remember them?)  made a video.  It was for one of their religion classes in high school.  And here it is for your viewing pleasure.  I suggest you empty your bladder first.

Learning to love like Henry

Our dear boy Henry has just about the biggest heart.  Whereas the Grinch’s heart is two times too small, I’d argue that Henry’s heart is about four times as big as mine.  He loves to hug and snuggle his little sister and he can’t seem to say goodbye to a friend without hugging their neck.  Sorry, 4 year old friend, if you aren’t a fan of hugs.  Henry is to hugging as Buddy the Elf is to whispering.  

So it is no surprise that Henry talks about his youngest sibling constantly.  You know, the child that hasn’t even been referred to us yet?  Yeah.  That one.  He prays for his little brother every night.  He has even named him.  We’ve told him that his little brother may have another name when he comes to live in our house, but that we can guarantee his last name will be Phillips.  To which Henry chirps, “Hey, that’s just like me!”  

And what has Henry named his little brother?  Charlie.  (He also insists that he will one day have a little sister named Rosie.  If you aren’t aware, both Charlie and Rosie are train friends of Thomas.  Oh, and before Gracie, he called the sibling he was waiting for James.)  And even though the child may be too old to change his name (or perhaps we will just shift his Chinese name to his middle name), we actually like the name Charlie.  And, for those of you who don’t know, my husband happens to go by his middle name.  What is Sloan’s first name?  Charles.  So it seems fitting that our son would be named for his Daddy.  

So we pray for Charlie.  These are the prayers of Henry:  that he will have sweet dreams, that his friends will share their toys with him, that he will like to play Thomas trains, and that when we go to China to pick him up he can go play at Jonathan and Isabel’s house (his cousins) and that upon our immediate return from China we will all go to Legoland.  These are our prayers for Charlie:  that he will be loved, that his caregivers will sing to him of God’s love, that he will receive all the medical attention he needs, that he will supernaturally see our family in his dreams so that we will not be strangers upon our first meeting, that God would prepare Gracie’s heart to be an older sister, prepare our hearts to parent a child with special needs, and for us to have patience as we wait for him.  We also pray that whoever put this idea about going to Legoland in Henry’s mind would shut the heck up.  For reals.

The other night, as a family, we watched a short video about Bethany and their special needs program in China.  

Bethany China from Bethany Christian Services on Vimeo.

At each and every picture with a boy, Henry said, “Is that Charlie?”  “No.”  “But is that a wittle boy with no mommy or daddy?”  “Yes.”  “Then we need to pray for them.  And maybe they can come to Legoland with us?”  

You might think it is wrong to expose Henry to the truth of orphans at such a young age.  It does make him sad.  And it might make you uncomfortable when Henry talks ad nasueam about how he is going to share his trains with his little brother, Charlie and that they will get bunk beds and tell stories at night and how it seems to him that this will be happening next week.  

But guess what?  It is right and good to be sad about sad things.  It is right and good to cry for those whom Jesus sheds many tears.  And we show the video, and pray with Henry for those orphaned, and talk about how some kids don’t have Mommy and Daddies alongside the bigger truths:  God is a Father to these children and loves them to the moon and back.  We, as God’s people, can be the ones to bring them into our families and love them and laugh with them and, yes, even take them to Legoland.  We can look to the day where there will be no more orphans, no more poverty, no more tears. And we can do it eagerly, expectantly, and with great assurance:  like Henry awaits his little brother.

X Games

I'd like to take a moment to brag about the terrific man I married.

 

He's recently become involved in a ministry at our church that takes kids from our church's local neighborhood and plays outdoor games with them and then there's a snack and a short gospel message.  This past Saturday, despite it being the first really December feeling day, there were a slew of kids ready to head to Byrd park to play.  Kids whose parents hail from South Sudan, Nepal, Malawi, and various South American countries intermingled with kids and folks from the oh so Suburban West End of Richmond.  

(Henry and Sloan do pushups.  Apparently it was someone's 11th birthday.  So they did 11 push ups.)

For the first time, the kids and I decided to join Sloan.  He thought it'd be fun for Henry and I wanted to see him as it was his turn to give the message.  He talked about what Christmas really means and that God coming to earth was the greatest gift of all and then he read the birth of Jesus from the Jesus Storybook Bible.

There were lots of things I loved about XGames.  For one, it was the opportunity to see heaven on earth.  Adults and kids from multiple nations, tongues and tribes coming together in Jesus' name.  Laughing, playing tug of war, running, doing push ups and climbing walls. 

I also loved how it was so simple.  In the western church, we tend to think that kids won't show up to church if we don't have printed Tshirts, pyrotechnics, and cookies made in the shape of astronauts.  Our supplies here were simple:  a big rope, some footballs and frisbees, a cooler of water, and a group of adults who wanted to be love to a gaggle of under-served kids.   We cheered for one another, competed against one another, and high fived one another.  And then my adorable husband got to tell these kids of the never ending love of someone else who cheers for them: Jesus. 

The Plum Panda

I promise that every upcoming post will not be about adoption fundraisers.  That said, I do plan to announce my new avenue to raise funds and to invite you to join in.  

I have created a facebook “shop” where folks can “buy” items by donating to our adoption fund at AdoptionJourney.Org.  I will be making picture frames, yarn wreaths (because I’m kinda addicted to felt flowers), and bows.  I’m sure there will be other crafts for sale as well as time goes.  As items are made, they will be posted on the site.  Items can also be commissioned for personalization. 

Folks have been sending me coupons to various craft stores and even donating items like paint, ribbon, and yarn to help the cause.  It’s been humbling to see how many folks are already loving our child.

Some folks have also generously offered their gifts, talents, and vacation properties to help the cause.  These items will be auctioned off after the New Year.  (Mainly so I’m not ignoring my kids during Christmas.)  Just to tease you, here are some items that have already been donated—some beautiful handmade pottery, some graphic art from an artist in Austin, TX (so you know it’s wicked cool), a photography session in Dallas with a professional photographer, and two one week stays at a Lake front beach condo in Litchfield By the Sea, SC.  So yeah, your family’s beach vacation could help bring an orphan into a forever family.  And that is just what people messaged me about in 15 minutes last night.

SO PLEASE OH PLEASE, LIKE “THE PLUM PANDA” ON FACEBOOK and invite your friends to as well.  Please share this post on facebook and twitter and click the “Like the Plum Panda” button in my sidebar.  

And oh yeah, why the Plum Panda?  Well, because we are adopting a special needs child from China.  And the Chinese are believed to be the first to cultivate plums and you’ve been living under a rock if the whole Pandas are from China is news to you.  Also, let’s be clear…how cute is a purple panda?  And my cute purple panda crafted by the generous Ali Fogarty?  A. Door.  A. Bull.

And why not just ask for donations?  Well, for one there is the whole people judging us thing.  And making things is a way for me to relax and be productive while patiently waiting on the Lord to do His thing to bring our child home.  But even more than that, I believe that it takes a village.  And that my family is part of the larger family of God.  And so this holy village will do great things in His name and for our child.  So it is an invitation to be a part of what God is doing.  Perhaps you have a talent we could auction off?  Perhaps you have a small business you’d like to promote?  Or perhaps you’d like to get a custom handcrafted item for a wedding present or baby shower?  Or perhaps you don't have money, but you'd sure love to help and you also like to cook.  Well, I can tell you people would probably be willing to donate $15-20 for you to deliver them a homecooked meal one night.  Everyone is gifted by God with something.  I'm simply asking you to honor Him and bless an orphan with the gifts you've been given.  (Forgive me if that sounded a little too Jim Baker/PTL for you.  It did for me.)

From time to time, I will feature some items on this blog in a feature called “Fundraising Friday”.  And there will always be a link to the Facebook page on this blog.  And, when I get the time, I’ll have another page on this blog or perhaps another blog devoted to it.  

Won’t you join us in seeing God at work? 

Guest Blogger: Rockstar Tracy Scoggins!

A friend of mine emailed me this last night and requested to be a guest blogger.  I read it, it made me cry, and now I'm posting it.   Tracy says that we rock her world.  Dear readers, know that the feeling is mutual.  Tracy is awesome.  I've been friends with her for close to a decade and she has pretty much been a part of praying into my life every big blessing I have:  Sloan, Henry, Gracie, and now P3.

Dear friends and Family of Elizabeth (and Sloan),

This blog posting might not be as entertaining as usual, because it wasn’t written by EJ.  I merely asked E to post this, for the hundreds, no thousands (millions?) of blog followers she has.

This is Tracy Scoggins, and the Phillips family rocks my world.  Their heart for orphans and their obedience to God’s call (see James 1:27) has really challenged me.  I too have a heart for orphans, and I want to do all that I can to support what they have taken on…international adoption of a child with special needs.  Gulp.  In addition to the next  18 years of expenses, there is a bunch required up front.  We’re talking many thousands of dollars.  MANY.  Think “2 brand new cars” (and on that note- they need a new van, but I digress…)

I am an independent Consultant with Thirty-One gifts, and I am asking you to join me in a fundraiser for the Phillips family.  All you need to do is shop.  I know what you’re thinking… “Now THAT is a fundraiser I can get on board with!”  Think about gifts that you’ll be buying in the coming months anyways, and then consider shopping now, for a great cause.

I will donate 100% of my commission to the Phillips Family Adoption fund, which equals 25% of all sales.  

All you need to do is go to my website, click on “place an order”, and then look for “Adoption Fundraiser for the Phillips family” and click “shop now” http://www.mythirtyone.com/tscoggins/

 

The fundraiser will run from now until January 13^th.  The customer special displayed on the home page will be the same the entire time.  Those thermal totes make great teacher appreciation day gifts, and they can be personalized!

Important notes:

IF YOU DO NOT LIVE IN THE RICHMOND AREA AND/OR DO NOT SEE ELIZABETH ON A REGULAR BASIS, PLEASE UNCHECK THE “SHIP TO HOST” BOX, AND OPT FOR DIRECT SHIPPING!

Most items can be personalized, for a flat fee of $7.  I just bought a Cindy Tote that says “adopted” (it’s a conversation starter, to allow me to share about how God adopted me and how I believe that every child deserves a loving family).

If you need a catalog or help with something, feel free to call or email (info is on my website).

Thank you so much for PARTNERING with the Phillips family as they take on this really exciting challenge!!!  

So happy and honored to be a part of this,

Tracy Scoggins

Good thing I like to collate

The papers are signed.  

Each portion is encased in a plastic sleeve and is clipped in a binder.  (And no, they aren’t neatly labeled.  Mainly because my daughter thought my label maker was a cell phone, tried calling Cookie Monster on it, and when no one answered, proceeded to threw it across the kitchen floor.  It died.  I may or may not have crumpled in tears.)

And because I like to think ahead, I will be photocopying each and every slip of paper and saving two copies.  One copy in case something gets lost somewhere.  One copy in case, well, well because I didn’t do this with Gracie’s file and a lot of this paperwork was the same.  So, yeah, one copy is in case we decide to go for P4.  (This is where Sloan rolls his eyes and tells me to focus on the present child before I start thinking about the next one.  It’s also where he grips the door frame and shakes his head.  But in a way that lets me know that he is on the same page.)

Tomorrow morning we head to the bank to get the last paper notarized and a stack of money order’s purchased. Then we will be hand delivering the binder to our agency, Bethany Christian Services.  Our goal was to have this completed December 15^th.  So we are two days early.

Which puts us one day closer to bringing our boy home.

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday

Thanks to a church school craft, there are two baby Jesuses in our homemade shoebox and pine needle manger.  Or is it Jesusi?  Jesusen?  Las dos crías Cristos?

Waiting Sounds like a Banjo

It has been such a gift for our family to celebrate Advent as we begin this international adoption journey.  It is preparing our hearts to worship the true child we're all longing for.  It is teaching our hearts what hopeful waiting looks like.  It is reminding us that faithful longing is good and right and expectant. 

Our waiting is to look like a kid on Christmas eve: jumpy, expectant, sure of the good gifts that await him.  It is NOT supposed to be burdened or mopey or doubtful or fearful or impatient or certain of despair.  Faithful waiting does not look for the other shoe to drop.

My church has a blog that accompanies the sermon each week.  And since the sermon series for Advent is on waiting, the blog is loaded up with paintings and songs and readings regarding this holy expectant longing.  Prior to looking at this blog, I would've suggested that God's holy waiting soundtrack would be full of dirges.  Maybe some monks bellowing baritoned Latin.  Perhaps some slow Kenny G-esque tenor sax.  (Apparently, I believed waiting on the Lord meant God was busy with another person and had put me on hold with some Jesus-y Musak.)

False.

The soundtrack of holy longing is frenetic.  It's toe tappin' music.  It's the kind of music that keeps you pointed to the One on whom you are waiting.  Simply put:  holy longing music usually has a banjo in it.  And perhaps a mandolin.  Better yet, both. 

So while I'm longing and waiting and hoping and praying, I'm going to be listening to this little diddy posted by my Pastor:


Trampled By Turtles-Wait So Long from Justin Gustavison on Vimeo.

The One Where I Ask for Your Money (Or not)

Sooooo…in case you haven’t been around in awhile, we are adopting from China.  And in case you’re headless, that is not an inexpensive endeavor.  That said, Sloan and I, along with Bono, believe that the God we serve is not short on cash.  And so while we’re not 100% sure where all the adoption funds are going to come from, we do have some inklings and we are making adjustments.

Some of you may have heard me proclaiming from the rooftops a couple of months ago that we were going to finally put my Suburban to rest and get a minivan. We saved and saved and saved and saved and were ready to put down a wad of cash on a Sienna when my husband heard the call to adopt again and I began dreaming of a little Asian boy in glasses running through my house.  So, despite my longing for a car whose doors open at the press of a remote and 17 cup holders and rows that fold quickly and doesn't constantly have a flashing Check Engine light, we’ve squashed that dream.  Or, at least, we are delaying it.  Because despite the Burbans troubles and dents, she is paid for.  

I gotta tell you, giving up a minivan seems like a much bigger thing to give up than Christmas cards.  I'll try not to exagerrate when I tell you that it was not a decision that came without tears.

So, perhaps in an effort to keep the Sienna dream alive, I came up with the idea to do fundraisers for the adoption: a yard sale, joining the BlogHer Ad network, figuring out some craft I can sell on Etsy, a friend hosting a 31 party for me and donating some of her commission to us, applying for grants, and even just letting folks donate money to a fund for us.  It was this last item that was a bit of a sticky wicket for us.

Here’s the thing: on some level, I do feel that adoption has a missional component.  It is a re-enacting of the Gospel.  We are leaving our comfort zone to go and bear with an orphan and bring back a son.  So in that respect, it feels right to invite others on this journey by soliciting prayer and funds.  However, the gospel also shows us that Jesus’ cost wasn’t only his heavenly throne but his very life.  (Therefore a delayed getting of a minivan seems pretty trite by comparison.)  And it is our cost to bear.  If you want to bear the cost of bringing an orphan home yourself, you should probably adopt as well.  (But if, say, you’re like 70 years old and you have those burlap sacks of cash with the money symbols on the sides just sitting around, we’ll take a couple.)  (I’m totally kidding.) (No, I’m not.)

However, if we invite others to donate money, we invite others to judge how we spend our money.  (Not that some people really need an invitation.)  An acquaintance of mine suggested that if we really wanted to adopt again, we should get rid of cable and internet, cell phones, pull Henry from preschool, never eat out again, never do date nights or birthday parties or presents again.   

Ummm…no.   

I need date nights and the occasional Steak Queso burrito from Qdoba.  And my husband, who works from home when he's not traveling, needs the internet.  And I could do without cable but we just signed a 2 year contract and there are fees if we break it.  And now I feel like I have to rationalize all of the ways I spend money to you.

If I let people donate to us are they going to be ticked when they see me post pics on Facebook of the kids Christmas presents? Or my pins on Pinterest about planning Henry’s Angry Birds themed birthday party?  Really, that judgment is the other person’s sin to carry and not ours, but we still feel its condemnation.  

At the same time, trust me when I say we are being very intentional with how we spend our money as of late.  And you should be intentional with your finances as well.  Maybe you should donate to our adoption fund.  Maybe it would be a way for God to work in your life.  But maybe, if you see my Facebook movie theater check-in when we go to see the Muppets over Sloan’s Christmas vacation and all you can think is, “Gosh, movies are expensive, if I’d known they were going to be so decadent, I wouldn’t have sent them $25” we really would rather you not help us out.  Donate straight to an organization like Bethany Christian Services or World Vision.  It’ll be tax deductible anyways, whereas the Phillips family, as awesome as we are, are not a 501©3 non-profit.  

All that being said, I’ll straight up take a donation of a new Toyota Sienna.  Smoky Topaz.  Leather Interior with the entertainment package.  I am, after all, going to be hauling around three kids soon.  Or a new Honda Odyssey.  I’m not picky.